Engagement Photusss

Haaaaa finally Shafiq Akmal of Candid Syndrome posted the photos from my engagement.

Unfortunately, Lingling and i kinda forgotten to bug him about setting an appointment to select photos for the album. Lambat lagi la nak dapat gambere dalam album nampaknye. But my family and my mom's friends are placated by the photos from my unofficial photogs, the delicious threesome, Shahran, Hendra and Kjell, and the fact that i've printed their (the fam and frens) photos is even better because they wanted something tactile to hold, to prove their photo were taken. Somehow, a photo in their inbox and in a slideshow wasnt enough to satisfy their hunger.

Shafiq Akmal of Candid Syndrome
The official photographer
(ie: the PAID photographer)

The Delicious Threesome
Hendra, Kjell and Shahran Ali
The pro bono photographers


The Delicious Threesome selected photos are available here (Engagement album I)
and here (Engagement album II)
(i need to add new photos with more family members faces in album II since i just figured out how to let non facebook users have access to album. hehe.)

Having four (five if we were to include the assistant) photographers at my engagement was definitely something i am extremely grateful for as they all had their own personal eye and style to photography and they covered the event from every possible aspect. My family have always been particular about wedding photos. One of the criteria for a job well done is, their faces are in the photos. Very very important. And having had 5 photogs! that was well covered. If one didnt catch Mak Teh arranging the hantaran, someone else will, and did.

A hint to give to relatives that hardly ever get their photos taken at important events, ask them to wear sunnies (sunglasses) indoor and outdoor. Confirm there would be at least one photo focused on him/her and they will be happy and they will not criticise your choice of photographer(s) ever again. Case in point in wearing sunnies in door makes you popular to photographer, my uncle who just had his eyes lasered, Pak E.

Every one of my photographers have him focused at least once. If your relative feels silly wearing sunnies indoor, ask them to stand or sit next to someone who doesnt feel silly doing so, or had valid reason not to feel silly. Or ask them to wear sunnies still and if anyone ask them why, tell them to answer "i just had them lasered, dahling!", so it wont be silly. Lying but not silly.

I am engaged!

I acknowledge i have been bad and not updating on my engagement. So bad! bad! spank! bad dayang!

actually i did try to post something short the day after the engagement but internet connection choose to be a problem when i decided to post it and it went into draft and me being me, whatever that goes into draft would hardly ever see the light of worldwideweb day ever again. sigh. but here i am! making up for lost time! I AM ENGAGED! ive been engaged for ...ermm..hmm...ermmm...10 days. wow.

Couple of nights after my engagement, my sister and i was sitting on the sofa watching tv when she suddenly looked at me and loudly exclaimed in her typical bimbonic cheerleader way where they put exclamation marks after each word like! you know?! like! this!

She looked at me and jumped to her knees, "Oh! my! God! ...you're like! *pause* engaged! *gasp* *pause*"

So it finally hit her that her sister have gotten herself engaged. ... such tragedy. such horror. ...how was i suppose to answer this? by giving my sister the usual look and sarcastic answer.

"ermm..*fake gasp!* im engaged! ...yeah. i know. i was there."

...she continued looking at me, all bug eyed and with her head slightly tilting to the right.
*pause* she looked at me quizzically and me looking back at her with what-is-the-matter-with-my-sister?! look. and she then after several dragged moment of silence that you could hear someone breaking the head of my gingerbread man, she dropped the bomb,

"....but you don't look any different....*blinkblink* *still staring at me*"

Sigh. yes. my sister.

I definitely dont look any different other than i have this blingbling of a ring on my left hand to signify i am betrothed to be married. I dont really feel any difference. This is 10 days after the event, so i guess everything is kinda calm right now. I did look different on my engagement day though! i looked pweeettyyy! coz i had Esham to do my make up and hair. I cant remember much from the day itself other than ....

It was nerve wrecking. i felt like i had an out of body experience wondering why everyone was in my room, taking photos of me and with me. felt like i was at someone else engagement and i was just a guest "menyibuk". but it all went well. thank you all for coming, i really REALLY appreciate it.

I had Shafiq Akmal from Candid Syndrome taking photos for the engagement and he was fantastic, making jokes with everyone in the room, made me feel comfortable and less of a stranger to him and more of a friend menyibuk taking photo of another friend. He was the official photog. But i have to say i really really love my unofficial but equally appreciated photog, Shahran, Hendra and Kjell that came down from Singapore just to be at our engagement.

The day started of with me remembering to eat and then (almost expectedly) cut my finger by something i havent figured out. Typical dayang to be accident prone. i cut myself on my ring finger on my right hand. Just nice la kan. that finger jugak la kan. So yeah, i have a cut on my ring finger on the day of the engagement. hehe.

Esham came and started doing my make up and my friends slowly started to trickle into the room. I was restless, i know. i cant help it. i get restless when im nervous...and waiting. i hate waiting. and when the make up and hair was complete....i was waiting some more! with my dad continuously calling me to call zul to ask for current status. and then i found out my dad had zul's number all along..........wwwwhyyyyy whyyyyyyy torture me so daddy?!

i thank the lucky stars i had my friends keeping me calm, making me "SIT DOWN!" (yayzah and ika were the pushy ones for this) and be poise and demure, started distracted me by talking to me, keeping me in conversations (malina, alia, nad and niza), and handing me a toy to strangle and keep my hands busy (malina). ...and then the rombongan came. i cant hear a thing, and zul was with his friends at the clubhouse having a drink by the pool with the boys. i heard marina's fiance who came with her somehow ended up with the boys there, and so was siddiq, aliza's husband who was part of zul's entourage from home. Boys will be boys.

And suddenly it was time to bring the hantaran downstairs.

It was agreed for zul to give me 7 hantarans and i were to reply with 9 hantarans. Since it was also his 26th birthday and his first birthday with me as his significant other, his hantaran were extra special and a lot of thoughts were put into them.

The butang baju melayu were set with amethyst stones, February birthstone.
And he received a complete set of clothes to be worn for the akad nikah.

There was a gingerbread girl and boy theme throughout. Guests received favours of a gingerbread boy or girl. And there were a gingerbread boy or girl hidden on each tray and i requested for a gingerbread couple lying on a cake as one of the hantaran. It turned out beautiful and im afraid, it will be copied by others from now on. Sigh.

Yada yada yada. I was nervous as hell and im glad i didnt run when i was going down the stairs and then...before i realise what has happened they have put a ring on my finger and i was engaged. Zul's sister Anne sms him to inform him that. Hes engaged. and so am i.

Before he can see his fiancee though, he was stopped by an army of mothers. My other mothers. The collection of toll. It was totally unexpected. Suddenly i had like 6 people surrounding me (actually shoving their ass towards me) and blocked my view and air supply and left me wondering what is going on, until i heard the phrase "bayar tol baru boleh tengok!"

and zul replying "ha?! tol?! ada seringit je ni! camna ni?!"

after must negotiation, they let him off with a warning to be better prepared in July. :)

and then i finally saw my fiance looking at me with.....confusion. yes, confusion. and then shock. then senyum berjela before he sat next to me.

and then suddenly! aunty fairuz (one of my other mothers) came, grab and shoved a pillow between us to act as a barrier! "baru tunang! takleh duduk dekat-dekat! kena ada barrier!"

Those were among the funny moments i can remember. Im glad everything went smoothly and everyone had fun. i have hundred of photos and so far, everyone looked so happy in them, so i am glad everyone had fun on my engagement day. thank you for being part of it.

12 hours to scary smiles all around

12 hours.

12 hours.

i met zul the last time as his girlfriend. tomorrow, he will be my fiance.

..
...
....

i am not going to be single anymore! i will be officially someone's fiance! bethroned! taken! unavailable! no-more-oggling-and-scandalous flirting! (openly that is and with *other intentions secretly or openly*). i ....have....12 hours to go.

how will i sleep??!!!!

..that is another matter coz my bed is filled with barang-barang hantaran and i dont have a bed to sleep on. ... sigh.

sigh..

12 hours...12 hours to endless smiles. dont shout dayang. dont scream. dont go jumping around. dont go spinning around. just smile. breathe and smile. breathe and smile.

ok.

i think now its out of my system, maybe i can sleep, soon.
wish me luck.

Donate a Dictionary Drive (DDD)

Lively: ok. boleh tahan. ... except they look kinda...erm relaxed and laid back. maybe because they are on their back. .... and ermm..not moving. lively means full of life...right? erm? active? ermm..full of spirit and vivacity? yeah ok.

Natural:

photog: "ok sayangS, i need to take a natural shot"

bride: "ok sayang, meet me in the secondary forest in my backyard, i shall wait for you in the stream ala puteri gunung ledang. you will not lose me as i will wear my pink wedding attire complete with the veil."

groom: "ok sayang, i will don my hot pink jacket and rescue you....do you really have to be in the middle of the stream? ill get wet! but its ok, you are my everything, what is a little cold streaming water will do to me? other than give me hypothermia, ruin the fabric of my dry clean only suit and get leeches up to my private areas. and to show i do not mind all of these, i will even kiss your hand, coz i am your prince charming, here to rescue you, my fair maiden. you just sit there and wait for me in a stream in a forest wearing your dry clean only (probably rented thats why i dont care) attire."

bride: "oh sayang, i do this all the time. every evening i trek in the forest in my best baju kurung / baju kebaya / rented wedding dress/ heels and soak in the stream whilst wearing them. remember sayang? this was how we met? you were trekking in the forest wearing your best clothes/ suit/ tuxedo/office attire/ dressing shoes, and sat to rest by the stream.its only natural we are to have our photo taken like so."

yes. that made a lot of sense. very natural indeed.

or maybe he meant in natural surrounding? ?? ????

Candid: 4: relating to or being photography of subjects acting naturally or spontaneously without being posed

Maybe it waaaassss natural and spontaneous. The groom likes to scare his lady like she is a 2 years old.

"garrgghh!! i.am.a.monster! fear me!"

and the bride naturally does slightly cover her mouth with her hand and slightly smile when she is surprised

"oh my God! you like totally like surprised me! like opocot! tehehe hehe tehehe".

except i dont understand why they did this natural and spontaneous portrait in front of the mosque instead in the bedroom...on the bed. Duh! stupid me! its natural and spontaneous! it doesnt have to be explained! thats why! ....

maybe if the photo title was explained more in detail it would have made more sense..

"Candid Shot of Suami Gersang,
Tak Tahan Hendak Menikam Isteri Sebaik Sahaja Disahkan Suami Isteri. "

yup. that must have been the case.

detailed: i just love a photo showing how dangerously close the eyeliner is to my eyeball. it mixes glamour and danger-of-my-eyeball-being-poked-and-yes-you-can-see-the-inside-of-my-
bottom-eyelids-that-are-normally-hidden.
dont you love this kind of details?

i give him credit. it IS detailed. but.........i really really dont like that pencil so close to my eyeball and having that photo as your top marketing strategy.


artistic: after all the comments above. i will not comment on the imagination of the photographer. he have plenty of imagination! not doubt about that! no-uh!

i wont name the photographer for that though i actually think he takes acceptable photographs. Not my cup of teh tarik perhaps. and i am sure he have actual "lively-natural-candid-more artistic-better detailed" shots.

And maybe he just need a dictionary.

Two down, four to go.

Congratulations darling, you are now a Puan.
Tears in her eyes right after Upacara Batal Air Sembahyang

Iza's mother taking a peek

It was a comment by her mother to one of her relative that made me think, she said

"Diorang ni dari darjah satu lagi kenal, kawan-kawan lama Jaja, dah nak kahwin dah sumer ni",

"Wow. She's pretty"

Wow. we have known each other for a loooooooong time and ALL of us are getting married this year (minus 1 of course who couldnt wait and got married 2 years before). The geng, is getting married and iza was the first for the year 2008.


I became the impromptu photographer since there wasnt a photographer in sight when i arrived and when when they did come, they didnt stick around in the room for long but instead did whatever they did downstairs...only once they pass their photos to iza will we discover why they went MIA from the bride's presence when she was getting ready. (*Dayang not happy about them). But heiii, them not being in the room gave more space for me to practice my stuff, and so i did. PPPffhhhtttttttt to them!







More photos are on facebook album. Coz there are ALOT!

When the truth and simplicity reigns

"It's not so easy loving me
It gets so complicated
All the things you've gotta be
Everything's changin
But you're the truth
I'm amazed by all your patience
Everything I put you through

When I'm about to fall
Somehow you're always waitin
with your open arms to catch me
You're gonna save me from myself
from myself, yes
You're gonna save me from myself

My love is tainted by your touch
Cuz some guys have shown me aces
But you've got that royal flush
I know it's crazy everyday
Well tomorrow may be shaky
But you never turn away

Don't ask me why I'm cryin
Cuz when I start to crumble
You know how to keep me smilin
You always save me from myself
from myself, myself
You're gonna save me from myself

I know it's hard, it's hard
But you've broken all my walls
You've been my strength, so strong

And don't ask me why I love you
It's obvious your tenderness
Is what I need to make me
a better woman to myself
to myself, myself
You're gonna save me from myself"

I think this is among the most beautiful song i've heard. Definitely a song i like to start my year with and to seriously consider the song for the wedding.

Lingling, this song is for you. Everything is for you now. A God knows you can relate to the lyrics! :)

Bridezilla?

You might be a Bridezilla if :

1) You think it'd be "really awesome" if the schoolchildren of some country-oh, say Luxembourg or Canada-could gather and hold candles and arrange themselves so they spelled out you and your groom's names from above.

2) You wonder why that mean ole mayor is being such a hard ass about a lil' ole tickertape parade.

3) You think it's OK to drain your 401K. After all, what's a little thing like pushing gambling with your security and paying whopping withdrawal penalty when you can have an ice sculpture on every damn table. ("ice sculpture be-gone!" more like it. Im in the group "NO! to ice sculptures at wedding!"

4) You don't think spray-painting 100 doves gold is the teensiest bit "over the top."

5) The Fire Marshal has come to your house to plead with you in person.

6) You don't understand why your fiance is being so pig-headed about letting your Chihuahua "Snooky" be his best man. (i want a puppy!!)

7) Your reception involves speedboats, hot-air balloons, or fireworks. (errr errr)

8) Your reception involves camels in any way. (or elephants..ive heard of elephants..or horse drawn carriage. *cringe*)

9) Your reception involves the Secret Service in any way.

10) Your reception involves NASA in any way.

11) Your reception involves the Pope in any way. (Instead of the Pope, i guess i have to refer to Imam Di-Raja? or Agong?)

12) You instruct the caterers to never look you in the eye and to always refer to you as "Her Majesty, The Bride." (i thought you guys are already calling me "Your Majesty" based on previous blog entry???? ...Your Majesty, The Bride have a nice ring to it though. Muahahahahahahha Hail me hail me!)

13) Your floral arrangements will leave several countries bereft of flora. (...i tried so hard to throw in the idea of paper flowers, but apparently it is so much easier to pluck 100, 000 roses than to make 800 individual paper flowers. sigh..recycled paper la doinks! what do you take me for?)

14) Al Gore calls to say he's concerned your floral needs will affect the Earth's fragile eco-balance.

Hmmm Hmmm what do you think? Am i there yet? I think my cousin the wedding planner can answer this. im kinda afraid what he will say. erk

Love,

The Panicking Bride

And OMG! only a month till engagement day! How will i breathe????!!!

The Panicking Bride

"Ready? Get set? GO!"

No, i am not ready. Get set? huh? is this really necessary? GO??!! now? already?? but i'm NOT READY!

Sometimes i feel this way. Not about marriage (jangan risau sayang). But about the whole wedding planning thing. Its in July. JULY! ...but its in full swing now, NOW! in JANUARY! i cant imagine (i really can't coz then i'll start panicking, for real) how it's going to be in may, even worse, in JUNE! OMG!!! (see, its starting)

I know that it's perfectly natural for girls (and women if you are those that think calling a woman, girl sounds immature), to imagine how their wedding day will be like since infancy, okay im exaggerating, since you can think!

For non-muslims and westerners, their think how they will walk down the decorated aisle, wearing their ballerina gown with their ballerina shoes, while the wedding march played from the church 100 years old organ, looking with tearful eyes to their hunkyhunky future husband ...with no face (though when you're 5 years old, you might have imagined marrying Tom Cruise. He was the it guy then for the 1980s kid. We deny the fact now coz...erm its Tom Cruise, except for Katie Holmes. I dont know what to say about her).

To us muslims and Malaysians, we played khawin-khawin where we would grab a reluctant (and sometimes not-so-reluctant) guy friend's arm and make him sit on a chair together with (the lucky?) girl and tadah! they are married! after that we have the kipas-kipas girls and a couple of friends that use mineral water in a bottle to soak "the newlywed couple" through and through. and rumput collected in bowl was place on their open palms and thrown everywhere. and if we have more than the 5 friends, we can play masak-masak too! so now we have a kenduri! that was our perception of a wedding ceremony. Wish it was that simple now.

Of course we thought about everything else too but we dont talk about it as much when we were younger coz nanti makbapakpakcikmakcik cakap anak depa gatai nak kawin.

Colours. Flowers. The wedding gifts. Honeymoon. Husband to be.
Everything have been thought about over and over and over again, until the day of the actual wedding day. By the time you are getting married, say 26 years old. That's a whole lotta years of thinking about a single day in your life!

Say you started playing with dolls and you have Barbie and Ken tying the knot at 5 years old. I deduct that is the time we started thinking about wedding (coz Barbie and Ken have to be married before they have sex and live together and for Barbie and Ken to be naked together and sleep on Barbie's pink queen size four poster bed, but maybe that is just me, but that is another story, and i am digressing. Moving on now....).

So anyway, started playing "the wedding" at 5, actual wedding at 26. That is a good 21 years of planning. As i said, whole lotta years to be planning for a really short period of time in retrospect of a whole lifetime.

Yet, it feels like im still not ready for the receptions.

The deco. the food. the photographer. the themes. the other stuff that wont compute in my head at this moment. It feels like i never, ever gave it any thought. And it doesnt help that i get new ideas for colours, dress, wedding favours, hantaran and its deco every day!

I cant decide from the many many choices i have. From the many many great, fantastic ideas thrown at me from everyone including people i dont know and people i will never know (not exclusive to each other nor inclusive). Therefore, combined with 21 other years of pre-planning, I am truly, truly overwhelmed.

A prime example of too much planning brings to indecisions ergo, no actual actions at all thus, defect the definition of planning and its purpose, and makes me sit down and surf the web and read more bridal magazines, therefore, giving me more great, fantastic ideas! which brings us back to more planning and the vicious cycle continues!

This is my current state of mind: Happy yet overwhelmed with a touch of panic.

You know what, this is what you call a panic post. The first post for my wedding series blogging.
If you dont like wedding related posting, tell me so i can save on the stamps and invitation cards. Orrrrr...you can visit some of the other 112, 000, 000 blogs available on the world wide web *as of December 2007, based on Technorati index.

Yours truly,
The Panicking Bride
January 2008